I'm fat. There's no pussy footing around that. I'm just above 5'10" and I weigh around 250 pounds. Everyone tells me I look great, and that I carry the weight very well. Doesn't take away the fact that I'm overweight.
I don't eat much, though. I always seem to be full before anyone else at the table, I'm guilty of going 24 hours without eating (I'm far from anorexic...I just forget to eat sometimes), and when I do eat I am within a 2000 calorie diet. I was told that that amount is the calories I need to maintain functioning, and having removed the vast majority of my calorie adders (candy, junk...) I've done pretty well. Yeah, I get a treat here and there, but I don't go as crazy as I used to.
So why have I been plateaued for the last 3 years at 250lbs? Yeah, it's not the 325ish pounds that I used to weigh, but it's still 250 freaking pounds.
I know I should work out, and it's not like I'm lazy...my house work is done (yaay for clean houses!), my job requires me to walk around the unit and do bed checks every 10-15 minutes (I tracked it, once...I average about 2 miles or so a night with the amount of walking I do), and I drink 90% of my fluids as water...WHY YOU NO LEAVE ME, STOOPID FAT!
*sigh*
I don't have the money to get a gym membership, and even if I did - where's the time? I could let housework slide and go to the gym, but then the house is gross. I could sleep a little less, but that would affect my depression (though working out = endorphins...endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't kill their husbands!)...I dunno.
Just feeling stuck. I'm happy with my husband, my kids, my home, my school, my work...I have financial stress, but who doesn't? I just...I don't wanna be fat any more, but I'm too "lazy" to do anything about it. BOO!
You are beautiful. I've been told that if you don't eat regularly, your body goes into starvation mode and stores more fat from food when you do eat. Perhaps, that's the problem?
ReplyDeleteI've heard that, too. I just need to remind myself to eat, and not to GORGE myself when I do eat. Last night I was ravenous @ work...couldn't get satisfied worth crap. :( So I ate more than normal. I just need to figure out a schedule that won't impact my sleep, but allows me to maintain the calories taken in at set times.
DeleteBAH!