In 1 months time my biological father will be released from prison. I'm nervous, sure. Now he knows what I look like, knows my name (since it was said & documented in the parole hearing), and so...yeah...I'm nervous. Not scared, though.
The VINE network (victim notification system) called me 11 freaking times, and I finally answered (since I was awake, not at work, and all that) and hopefully the calls stop. I appreciate them wanting to make sure I got the message, but holy snap. Leave a voicemail!
*sigh* I am bigger than he is, stronger than he is, and I doubt he'll do anything stupid (at least in regards to me and my family) to go back to prison. But he's also been locked up for the greater part of 20 years...and that's a long time to build up anger and frustration. :(
I wish he had apologized to me during the parole hearing...but he didn't. I wish I knew he really felt sorry for what he put me through...but I don't know if he does. In my mind I feel that if he was truly sorry then he would have stayed out of prison the first time he was released (he'd been paroled 3 or 4 times and always ended up back in prison)...
I hope I remain the only victim of his...I hope that he gets out and is able to be a success outside of the prison system...While I would rather he remain locked up forever, since I will live with my scars forever, he's being released. So I just hope he doesn't ever come back into my life...
I'm nervous. But I'm no longer little, and I'm no longer afraid.
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